Exactly What to Say "The Magic Words for Influence and Impact" by Phil M. Jones is a book that provides practical guidance on using persuasive language to communicate effectively and achieve your goals. Here are some key ideas from the book:
The Power of Words
Jones emphasizes that the words you use in your conversations can significantly impact the outcome. Choosing the right words can influence people's decisions and actions.
Frame Your Questions
The book suggests using specific framing techniques to guide conversations. For example, asking "How committed are you to making this work?" instead of "Do you want to try this?" can lead to a more positive response.
Create a Positive Perception
Jones discusses the importance of creating a positive perception in the minds of others. Using language that conveys confidence, competence, and empathy can help build trust and credibility.
Handle Objections
The book provides strategies for addressing objections or concerns effectively. Jones recommends acknowledging objections, empathizing with the other person's perspective, and then offering a persuasive response.
Use Assumptive Phrasing
Assumptive phrasing involves assuming that a certain outcome or action will occur. This technique can be used to gently guide people toward making decisions or commitments.
The Power of Three
Jones highlights the effectiveness of presenting information or arguments in groups of three. Three key points or benefits can be more memorable and persuasive than a longer list.
The Agreement Frame
The book introduces the "agreement frame," a technique that encourages agreement and cooperation. It involves using statements like "I assume we can agree that..." to establish common ground.
Avoiding Negative Words
Jones advises against using negative words or phrases that can trigger defensive responses. Instead, focus on positively framed statements and questions.
Silence as a Tool
The book discusses the strategic use of silence in conversations. Pausing can give the other person time to think and respond, potentially leading to more favorable outcomes.
Continuous Improvement
Jones emphasizes the importance of practice and continuous improvement in using persuasive language effectively. He encourages readers to refine their communication skills over time.

"Exactly What to Say" is a practical guide for individuals looking to improve their communication and persuasion skills. It provides specific word choices and phrases that can be used in various situations to influence others positively. The book's techniques can be applied in both personal and professional contexts to achieve desired outcomes and build better relationships.